[Trrrrr]
Allo; This is Sergei; You know me from your televisors
If you xaven’t forgotten me already
[Click]
I started the veek as a cuddly stars of TV advert
Life was simples
Aall I had to do was to turn up to verk in my pyjamas and be myself
Now I find maayself an international pariah
[Trrrrrr]
It aall began ven Uncle Volodya started vhispering in my ear
“Sergei” he said, “Sergei, I vont to create a single insurrance markets”
“Good” I said. “Good”
[click]
“Khow can we do zat?”
It was a simples question
But Uncle Volodya became very angry
[sigh]
[Trrrrrrrr]
“Der iz not a VHY and der iz not a KHOW” he said
“Der iz only de XISTORICAL DESTINY!
Do VHAT you mast do”
Zen he shuffeled off
[click]
But I am a simples meerkat
Not some titan of ze insurrance vorld
But that night I xad a dream of my great-uncle Fyodor
“Sergei”, he said, “Sergei, just be yourself”
So, I did
[Trrrrrrrrr]
I be myself
Over and over and over again
Until zere vas no corner of ze UK economic vhere vos not Sergei
[click]
But zen Борис, addressing parliament, said
“This tide of meerkat hegemony is totally unacceptable
We demand the unconditional withdrawal of Sergei from every niche and cranny of British life”
This was total car crash
Nex day I am receive my P45
[Trrr]
And so, meerkat disappears from British life
Da Svedaniya simples li_
