Now gather round children; Today I’m going to tell you a story about one of the heroes of our country, General Cluster____ Please Miss? Yes, Jerome? Wasn’t he a white man? Well, yes, Jerome, strictly speaking he was Then didn’t he have white privilege, like you were telling us about Miss? Well, no, not really,… Continue reading Cluster____’s Last Stand
Category: Sketch
Top Trumps
The next people to face the Dragon’s Breath are a young man from Swindon [pause for sneer], called Bobbie and a young woman from Middlesbrough called Al – he’s the one with the spiky red hair and the nose-ring and she’s the one with the forked beard and the wooden leg, just in case…. Together… Continue reading Top Trumps
Sic Gloria Transit Mundi
Two slight acquaintances are seated in a Roman bathhouse: Gaius Julius? Sextus Lividicus; my wife knows your wife Hm How is your wife? Taken to her bed. Worn out by too much gossiping with her sister. How is your wife? Taken to my best friend’s bed, damn him. I’m recommending to the Assembly that he… Continue reading Sic Gloria Transit Mundi
A Midwinter Day’s Nightmare or “Down the Pan”
By Billy Shakestick Dear listener, draw near. I have a tale of intrigue in the affairs of states, mendacity in high office and of the fulminations of the rabble. Not just any tale, but a wondrous gallimaufry. A man, a voter, in a distant land preparing to go to the polls, falls asleep after a… Continue reading A Midwinter Day’s Nightmare or “Down the Pan”
The Stars at Night: Music of the Spheres
HelloandwelcometoanotherepisodeofStarsatNightwithmePatrickMoore. ThethemefortonightsshowisTheMusicoftheSpheres. NowImmoreofaBeethovenfanmyself, butmyfirstguestthiseveningisrathernimblefingeredonthe-elec-tric-gui-tar, aswellasanaccomplishedastronomerandagoodfriend, Brian May HeLLO GLAS…tonbury….good to be here, Patrick. Not just a friend, You’re my best friend NowtheBBCinitsinfinitewisdom has decreed thatasaconditionofnotlaunchinganasteroidattheshow, wemusthavegreaterdiversity. SoIwouldliketowelcometotheshow, theresidentastrologerofthesun, The-Sun-news-paper that is, Mystic Meg It’s a blessing to be here, Patrick NowMeg – DoIcallyouMegorMystic – what do you make of the BBC’s decision to ban any… Continue reading The Stars at Night: Music of the Spheres
Trouble on Lineland
It’s all go on the internetwork this morning Things are starting to move at Lineland “work” station Danny the desktop is having his buttons pushed Oo-er Cuthbert the cursor is flashing like mad Tut-tut, Cuthbert, not very PC that! Gerald the gay icon – he who once dared not hide his light – is a… Continue reading Trouble on Lineland
Navigating the Maze of Intersectionality
It had been some good few days since the last time Ziggy had been out on a road trip with his friend Zara, postmodern-day prophet of renown. As it was, Zara had just that day taken delivery of a new set of keys for the Maserati in which they were now comfortably ensconced. Ziggy had… Continue reading Navigating the Maze of Intersectionality
Woke History of the UK
There is much controversy these days about what constitutes an authentic portrayal of the broad sweep of UK history. So it was that on one of their recent road-trips that Zara (aka Zarathustra, the postmodern-day prophet of all things woke) was quizzed by his friend Ziggy as to what his take was on the subject.… Continue reading Woke History of the UK
Is Any Self-Respecting Statue Safe These Days?
“So what’s your take on this Cancel Culture everyone is talking about?” As always the question put by Ziggy to his mentor Zara, aka Zarathustra postmodern-day prophet of renown, was posed in a manner which appeared innocuous enough. “Who’s this ‘everyone’ you’re talking about?” came back the retort. Did Ziggy detect a tinge of defensiveness… Continue reading Is Any Self-Respecting Statue Safe These Days?
Diversity and the Avoidance of Prejudice
Those who are familiar with the exploits of Zarathustra, postmodern-day prophet of renown will know that it is his wont to drive from time to time to the local village so that the inhabitants might benefit from his sermons on the subject of social justice and the role they, the villagers, played in obstructing it.… Continue reading Diversity and the Avoidance of Prejudice